Last night was a busy one at Regina's Ristorante. I ended up getting all sorts of good tables towards the end of the night and was the last server there. Well, when it was all slowing down and my last table was just finishing their bottle of wine, I talked a little bit to Regina. Yes, Regina, as in Regina's Ristorante. She's not usually at the restaurant (she's at the new one that just opened a few weeks ago), but her husband Phil is. So last night was my first real time to talk with Regina.
It all started harmlessly enough. She asked me how many nights a week I've been working at the restaurant. I told her five but that would get cut to about three when school started in a few weeks. She asked what I was going to school for and I told her counseling. The normal question followed: "What do you want to do with that?" I told her I wanted to do something with travel and youth ministry. I quickly realized she didn't think this was all that great.
She had a look of disgust on her face and replied, "Is there any money in that?"
I told her there really wasn't and she just said, "Well, I guess eveyone has to do something."
I told her I wasn't really going into it for the money, and it was pretty clear she thought I was really really odd. It's not like at Taylor when people would look down on you if you were going into something for the money. Indeed, it was the exact opposite, and honestly, I was a little hurt, a little saddened, a little discouraged.
That's all to my little story. See you later.
Sunday, July 31, 2005
Friday, July 29, 2005
Cather in the Rye
I have challenged myself to read more fiction, mostly classic fiction from the years before. Well, I've always hears about "Cather in the Rye," and last night I turned the last page. Holden had become something of a companion to me, a companion by whom I was very much intrigued and perplexed. It seems loneliness is common, that growing up is difficult, that sex is confusing.
Like Holden, I completely agree with all three statements.
Like Holden, I completely agree with all three statements.
Thursday, July 28, 2005
Where is the Love?
We sell newspapers at Starbucks so just about everyday I check out the headlines. And almost every time I do, I get sad and see that there's been another bombing, another attack, dozens more killed.
Last weekend I was reading in the Chicago Sun-Times during my lunch break and almost started to cry. It just seems there will be no stop. It seems that seeing bombings and seeing people living in fear has become the norm in our world.
In the Sun-Times on Saturday, July 23, I read about the one suspect killed by the London police in the corner of a subway car. Towards the end of the article, I read that "Muslims gathered for afternoon prayers, voicing renewed concerns about a backlash. One mosque was evacuated after a bomb threat...More than 100 alleged revenge attacks have been reported since the July 7 suicide attacks."
It really seems that the world has become madness. The Black Eyed Peas had it right. In their song, "Where is the love?" (and no, this does not mean I am affirming all of the Black Eyed Peas philosophy...) they sing,
"People killin', people dyin'
Children hurt and you hear them cryin'
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek
Father, Father, Father help us
Send some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love?"
I'm just a little overwhelmed with the world today. And honestly, I really wonder what can be done, what I can possible do. I wonder if Christians can love more. I wonder if I can love more. I wonder about a lot of things, but today I most wonder when it will be that Jesus will return.
Last weekend I was reading in the Chicago Sun-Times during my lunch break and almost started to cry. It just seems there will be no stop. It seems that seeing bombings and seeing people living in fear has become the norm in our world.
In the Sun-Times on Saturday, July 23, I read about the one suspect killed by the London police in the corner of a subway car. Towards the end of the article, I read that "Muslims gathered for afternoon prayers, voicing renewed concerns about a backlash. One mosque was evacuated after a bomb threat...More than 100 alleged revenge attacks have been reported since the July 7 suicide attacks."
It really seems that the world has become madness. The Black Eyed Peas had it right. In their song, "Where is the love?" (and no, this does not mean I am affirming all of the Black Eyed Peas philosophy...) they sing,
"People killin', people dyin'
Children hurt and you hear them cryin'
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek
Father, Father, Father help us
Send some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love?"
I'm just a little overwhelmed with the world today. And honestly, I really wonder what can be done, what I can possible do. I wonder if Christians can love more. I wonder if I can love more. I wonder about a lot of things, but today I most wonder when it will be that Jesus will return.
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
My Buddhist Boss
I've been working quite a bit at Starbucks these last few weeks. Some days I like it, some days I don't. Today one of the other baristas asked me when I had gone to Germany (some German girls had come in so I had talked about Germany with them) and then asked me what other countries I'd been to. I kinda felt embarassed (and also remember how amazingly blessed I am) and towards the end of the list I said "Nepal."
I've been thinking about Nepal a lot lately. I think about Nepal a lot all the time it seems, but especially this summer since Taylor and Dawnette and Scotty are there. But when I said Nepal, my boss, John, the store manager, got so excited. John had told me when I interviewed that he was Buddhist and he didn't say much, and the store was pretty busy, but he mentioned how he would love to go there, visit Tibet and the places of Buddhism and speak with monks and the Dalhi Lama.
I found myself quite sad. I wanted to sit down and talk with him for hours about what I experienced in Nepal and why I choose to follow Christ. I would be so scared, and part of my sadness came from knowing that I never feel like I have enough answers for a good apologetics discussion. I know it's not about answers and questions and finding contradictions and reasons, but it just helps in my mind. I find myself wanting to talk to him about Buddhism and why that is the religion he chooses, but I haven't yet. Perhaps over time. Perhaps we will have good and challenging discussiong (for both of us) and come to a greater understanding of our own and the other's religion. Perphaps God will use me. Perhaps I will run away and simply move to Nepal, open a Starbucks, and wait for all of the people that may come my way.
I've been thinking about Nepal a lot lately. I think about Nepal a lot all the time it seems, but especially this summer since Taylor and Dawnette and Scotty are there. But when I said Nepal, my boss, John, the store manager, got so excited. John had told me when I interviewed that he was Buddhist and he didn't say much, and the store was pretty busy, but he mentioned how he would love to go there, visit Tibet and the places of Buddhism and speak with monks and the Dalhi Lama.
I found myself quite sad. I wanted to sit down and talk with him for hours about what I experienced in Nepal and why I choose to follow Christ. I would be so scared, and part of my sadness came from knowing that I never feel like I have enough answers for a good apologetics discussion. I know it's not about answers and questions and finding contradictions and reasons, but it just helps in my mind. I find myself wanting to talk to him about Buddhism and why that is the religion he chooses, but I haven't yet. Perhaps over time. Perhaps we will have good and challenging discussiong (for both of us) and come to a greater understanding of our own and the other's religion. Perphaps God will use me. Perhaps I will run away and simply move to Nepal, open a Starbucks, and wait for all of the people that may come my way.
Thursday, July 21, 2005
My July Life
It seems my life has become "normal." I don't like it one bit actually.
The weddings of the summer are pretty much over, climaxing two weekends ago when Joy's brother and my brother got married the same weekend. Lots of family, lots of laughter, lots of fun. I think the absolute highlight had to have been when my sister passed out during my brother's wedding. Thankfully she was hidden at the moment by the groomsmen, so many people didn't even notice, but I saw the whole thing happen while I was singing, so needless to say, it was quite the event of the day. Matt and Becki are still in Hawaii and Nate and Jess our on their way back to the Philippines (via Hawaii and Japan...think they saw the Bellitos on the beach?) and I have been back to a whole lot of work here in Chicago.
I know it's good for me, it really is. Especially since Joy and I sat down and realized just how many expenses are coming this way this fall. Graduate school, honeymooon, wedding rings. Goodness, we even want to start a mutual fund. So many mornings I wake up at four for my Starbucks gig, get a little nap in the afternoon, and then head to the restaurant. Then I do the whole thing again the next day.
Like I said, I don't like it one bit.
It just seems like being an adult really isn't all that much fun. My dad used to always tell me this and I never wanted to believe him. I still don't. I want to believe that even if life is regular and monotonous and routine, I can still love it and I can still love my job.
Somedays I like Starbucks and other days I dream of pouring 180-degree steamed milk all over some customer. Some days I like the restaurant and other days I dream of walking out right in the middle of a busy Saturday night.
I think part of the whole problem is that I don't actually know anyone. I know Joy and her parents and that's about it. I don't feel very comfortable at either of my jobs and don't actually think any of the people I work with actually know one real thing about me. That makes me sad. It also makes me lonely. I remember I used to laugh a lot. I miss that. I miss friends. I miss being comfortable.
That's all I have to say for now. I am optimistic and remember that I hated the OG for many months and then was shockingly sad when it was time to leave. Maybe I'm just not as good at change as I thought I was.
The weddings of the summer are pretty much over, climaxing two weekends ago when Joy's brother and my brother got married the same weekend. Lots of family, lots of laughter, lots of fun. I think the absolute highlight had to have been when my sister passed out during my brother's wedding. Thankfully she was hidden at the moment by the groomsmen, so many people didn't even notice, but I saw the whole thing happen while I was singing, so needless to say, it was quite the event of the day. Matt and Becki are still in Hawaii and Nate and Jess our on their way back to the Philippines (via Hawaii and Japan...think they saw the Bellitos on the beach?) and I have been back to a whole lot of work here in Chicago.
I know it's good for me, it really is. Especially since Joy and I sat down and realized just how many expenses are coming this way this fall. Graduate school, honeymooon, wedding rings. Goodness, we even want to start a mutual fund. So many mornings I wake up at four for my Starbucks gig, get a little nap in the afternoon, and then head to the restaurant. Then I do the whole thing again the next day.
Like I said, I don't like it one bit.
It just seems like being an adult really isn't all that much fun. My dad used to always tell me this and I never wanted to believe him. I still don't. I want to believe that even if life is regular and monotonous and routine, I can still love it and I can still love my job.
Somedays I like Starbucks and other days I dream of pouring 180-degree steamed milk all over some customer. Some days I like the restaurant and other days I dream of walking out right in the middle of a busy Saturday night.
I think part of the whole problem is that I don't actually know anyone. I know Joy and her parents and that's about it. I don't feel very comfortable at either of my jobs and don't actually think any of the people I work with actually know one real thing about me. That makes me sad. It also makes me lonely. I remember I used to laugh a lot. I miss that. I miss friends. I miss being comfortable.
That's all I have to say for now. I am optimistic and remember that I hated the OG for many months and then was shockingly sad when it was time to leave. Maybe I'm just not as good at change as I thought I was.
Tuesday, July 05, 2005
My Weekend Rundown
Oh how the days have gone. I am on my way to take a nap (I was up at 4 this morning...), so I'm gonna make this short.
SATURDAY
The future in-laws, Mr. and Mrs. Bellito, took Joy and I to Wrigley for my second Cubs game of the year. This time, there were no snow flurries, the ivy was in full glory, and we had pretty fantastic seats, about 25 rows up right on the first base line. Pretty sweet. I even learned how to keep score with a score card and will proudly show it to anyone who is interested. Cubs lost again (I think they're at 4 in a row now or something), which means I still have never seen them win, but hopefully soon. There's just something about it that makes me long to go back.
SUNDAY
After a morning church time with the visiting Eric Miller, the Wightman youngings and I made a great lunch of BLT's supplemented by Mrs. Wightman's ridiculously amazing cookies. Then it was off to meet Loralee for a day downtown. It was my first time to the Taste of Chicago and it was everything I thought it would be. We walked with the masses, stopping every once in a while to trade in some tickets for some tasty treat. We felt amazingly American. We couldn't imagine any other country where people pack out the park to walk around and feed themselves over and over again all afternoon. In essence, we loved it. My favourites were a giant steak burrito, a watermelon icee, and a great saffron rice with goat meat. Yummy. After walking with the hundreds of thousands, we found our way to a little grassy area near the lake where we spread the blankets, opened up the bag of cherries, and sat and waited for the fireworks show. We ended up running into all sorts of people from Joy's church and eventually Breck and Heather, our friends from Blom's wedding, found their way to our area as well. The fireworks were positively splendid and the rush to find a bathroom afterwards was priceless...
MONDAY
In the morning I went to the church where all the Royal Servant teams had gathered for a commissioning service before flying overseas. Kelly's sister Kim is off to Nepal this summer, so the Blomgrens were there as were many RS alumni that I cherish and love. There was even a surprise visit by Andrew Ulasich and Drew Torrence. Truly, a great afternoon. We then took the Blomgrens and headed over to the Bellito residence for a 4th of July dinner.
TUESDAY
This morning, at 9:53 a.m., I passed my verbal exam and officially became a Starbucks barista. I am no longer just a partner, but I now possess that coveted title which basically means I can make any possible drink you may throw at me. Bring it on. It was a proud moment in my life.
With that said, I'm heading down for a nap. Peace out.
SATURDAY
The future in-laws, Mr. and Mrs. Bellito, took Joy and I to Wrigley for my second Cubs game of the year. This time, there were no snow flurries, the ivy was in full glory, and we had pretty fantastic seats, about 25 rows up right on the first base line. Pretty sweet. I even learned how to keep score with a score card and will proudly show it to anyone who is interested. Cubs lost again (I think they're at 4 in a row now or something), which means I still have never seen them win, but hopefully soon. There's just something about it that makes me long to go back.
SUNDAY
After a morning church time with the visiting Eric Miller, the Wightman youngings and I made a great lunch of BLT's supplemented by Mrs. Wightman's ridiculously amazing cookies. Then it was off to meet Loralee for a day downtown. It was my first time to the Taste of Chicago and it was everything I thought it would be. We walked with the masses, stopping every once in a while to trade in some tickets for some tasty treat. We felt amazingly American. We couldn't imagine any other country where people pack out the park to walk around and feed themselves over and over again all afternoon. In essence, we loved it. My favourites were a giant steak burrito, a watermelon icee, and a great saffron rice with goat meat. Yummy. After walking with the hundreds of thousands, we found our way to a little grassy area near the lake where we spread the blankets, opened up the bag of cherries, and sat and waited for the fireworks show. We ended up running into all sorts of people from Joy's church and eventually Breck and Heather, our friends from Blom's wedding, found their way to our area as well. The fireworks were positively splendid and the rush to find a bathroom afterwards was priceless...
MONDAY
In the morning I went to the church where all the Royal Servant teams had gathered for a commissioning service before flying overseas. Kelly's sister Kim is off to Nepal this summer, so the Blomgrens were there as were many RS alumni that I cherish and love. There was even a surprise visit by Andrew Ulasich and Drew Torrence. Truly, a great afternoon. We then took the Blomgrens and headed over to the Bellito residence for a 4th of July dinner.
TUESDAY
This morning, at 9:53 a.m., I passed my verbal exam and officially became a Starbucks barista. I am no longer just a partner, but I now possess that coveted title which basically means I can make any possible drink you may throw at me. Bring it on. It was a proud moment in my life.
With that said, I'm heading down for a nap. Peace out.
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