Beej

For the last week, I've had this feeling like I've wanted to write, but everytime I thought about it, I realized I just didn't have words. The vast majority of you who read my blog surely know about the accident that happened a week ago today. For those of you who do not know, a Taylor University van carrying students and staff were involved in a collision with a semitrailer. Four Taylor students and one staff were killed in the crash. Needless to say, families and friends have been devastated. One of the students who was killed was Brad Larson, a senior who was set to graduate in a few weeks and then start law school in the fall. Brad was a friend of mine, and I was able to live on the same wing as Brad during my senior year of college.

As I mentioned, during this last week I've been without words, and largely, I still am. A numbing sense of pain and sorrow have been overwhelming, especially as I have thought about his family and seen his closest friends try to grapple with something that simply cannot be understood.

Yesterday some words were given to me by one of my clients. I was at my new job where I get to work one-on-one with kids and teens and while we were driving, one of my kids asked me what I did over the weekend. I thought for a second about giving a simple "oh, not much" kinda answer, but I just couldn't do it. So I told him about the accident and how I went to the funeral on Sunday. I told him about how Brad was a friend of mine and we had just been in Boston together less than two weeks before he died. Then my kid, who is still in the single digits, asked me how old my friend was. I told him 22. I know that I'm the counselor and the kid's the client, but the response made me get teary eyed all over again: "You're really lucky you got to know him since he didn't live that long." I had no response. After a minute, I simply said, "Yeah, I am."

I can honestly say that I looked up to Beej, as we all called him. He had qualities that would normally make you envious, but he was just too likable to be envied. He was intelligent, witty, considerate, sensible, wise, funny, down to earth, athletic, sincere, godly, and even good-looking. One of the things I admired most about Beej was that he was okay with who he was. Sure, he had areas in his life he wanted to improve and grow, but he was okay being the person that he was, not trying to form to fit some mold or change himself when around different groups of people. I always thought that was admirable and always wanted more of that for myself.

Beej will certainly be missed. And who knows, perhaps he now knows if there is more sand in a mile or gallons of water in the ocean.