Another School Year

It’s always sad when the end of summer comes. But I always get this sense of excitement too. An eagerness for a new year, a movement towards change, a willing surrender to challenge. This feeling of raw energy is more palpable this year as I try to arrange the various commitments I have into one lavish meal where each course enhances the other. The main course for me is my internship, which I just started this week. I’m terribly excited about the agency where I will be for the next nine months. OMNI Youth Services is an excellent training facility and known for their innovative practices with adolescents and families. I plan on experiencing tremendous growth as a clinician, and I’m ready to put theories and tests and lectures into practice.

When it comes to working with people as a clinician, I think it’s important that research inform practice and practice inform research. It makes sense, and I want to participate in both throughout my life. Obviously, if I plan on applying to Ph.D. programs (and I do), research becomes the main course. In order to strengthen this part of my application for schools, I am volunteering on two research teams this year at other universities. One looks at speed-dating to gain information on initial romantic attraction; the other studies the efficacy of Oxford Houses as a possible post-residential option in the addictions field. Completely different areas, completely different research, and I’m completely unprepared for both. That may be an exaggeration, but I definitely feel a little in over my head. Hopefully that’s how I’ll learn, right?

So now we have my internship as the main course and I’ll put the research projects as the two sides. Now we need an appetizer and dessert. For the appetizer, I have my comprehensive exams coming up in October as well as the GRE. If I don’t pass the comprehensives, I don’t graduate in May, and then the whole idea of more school is pretty much out of the question. For those of you who don’t know me, dessert is my least favorite part of the meal. Joy hates it, but it’s true. When we go out to eat, if there’s an option of either an appetizer or dessert, I will always pick the appetizer. I like dessert once I actually start eating it, but it never actually sounds all that great (unless of course it’s sorbet or fresh fruit, but Joy says those don’t even count as desserts). So I’m going to put Ph.D. applications as my dessert. It’s a huge undertaking, and I have about 10 schools I’m applying to. And honestly, I’m scared. I’m scared of not getting in anywhere, and I think I’m also scared of getting in, because then it means a whole lot of work and probably six years of feeling in-over-my-head.

The year is off and running. I am ready to go, ready to take it on. I hope I feel the same way in a month or two. I’ll let you know.